I’ve spent a lot of time over the last four years working with kids. Some come from great families. Some from families that are just trying to hold it all together. Some don’t even know what the word “family” means.

I’m really lucky. I have two: my birth parents- still together- John and Vicki, and my “adopted parents,” Buddy and Barbara. They didn’t adopt me. I adopted them.

I could write about all the ways both sets have been there for me. But, it’s Mother’s Day weekend, so dads are getting the shaft.

My birth mother: still over-protective, still supportive, and still lets me know all the time (through words and actions) that she would do anything for me. She still sends me cookies- all the way across the country- and still spends all day in the kitchen making my favorite foods whenever I come home. Sometimes I like to antagonize her, to tell her about skydiving and mountain bike crashes and voting democrat. She likes to tell me she loves me.

She was there that day, when everything fell apart, and she cried even harder than I did. She’s been there to help me rebuild a life.

I’d be pretty lucky if she was my only mother.

But Barbara’s been there too: always smiling, always enthusiastic, always believing in me. Last time we had dinner she asked me what my three hopes were for the coming year. Then she wrote them down- she wrote them down- and said she’ll be praying they come true and help in any way she could. And the way she said it made me believe she would.

I know that any time I’m home, in New York or Charleston, there’s a bed, and food, and a lot of love. And it really means a lot.

Moms, know that I tried to scrape together money for flowers. I promise I’m not cheap, just poor. Be proud of me because I used the “flower fund” to do laundry at the Laundromat instead of washing my clothes in the shower. You’ve successfully civilized me. I love you both.

I don’t know if either of you have seen this video, so here it is (just click the triangle below to play it.) Thanks for walking with me through the bad times and the great, and thanks for being there for the celebration.

John + MJ from Pistil Films on Vimeo.